Scottish weather

The Scottish Weather is pish. Just when we need a RELIABLE window of weather for Barbeques, T in the Park and other Summer festivities, the weather lets us down. In a world where failing to plan is planning to fail, we need the mother of all back-up plans, to help a whole country forget about the weather for once.

A large dome, similar to that at The Eden Project be constructed over the landmass so we can enjoy Truman Show-style bright sunny days to enjoy this magnificent wee country of ours.

Does anyone have any other suggestions for encouraging Summer in Scotland. Should EVERY city have a Wimbledon-Centre Court type structure, so rain NEVER stops our play?

Give em a slap
Light SlapMild SlapSlap them around a bitHard SlapYer Skelpt! (19 slaps, average: 4.21 out of 5)
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  • If we get a harpoon style rope big enough and fire it in Mexico’s direction – do you think they could pull us all south?

  • [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Cherisse Todd and Aleks Bochniak, Dunning. Dunning said: The Scottish weather is pish. Some thoughts on our new Skelpt Arse website. Leave a comment, or slap away! [...]

  • Roll on global warming, keep the CO2 pumping!

  • John! Shame on you.

  • If we didn’t have so much rain, we would not have such a beautiful country. Just put on your wellies and get out there anyway.Being drookit is better than being sunburnt, IMO

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What is Skelpt Arse?

To use a splendid bit of sadly, now seldom-used Scottish vernacular, whose 'arse' definitely needs 'skelpt'?

Who or what has been letting you down, letting our magnificent country down or who generally needs brought into line. Politicians? Overly politically-correct-mandarins? Jobsworth civil-servants? Service industry specialists who've not been servicing? You tell us!

We've got a sliding scale of 'skelpitness' from a light smack or a pure, red, stinger? You decide!

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