Old people behind the wheel are bloody dangerous. This video is only the half of it.
How many of you have driven behind an old git, only to be driven to the point of distraction by their slow driving, lack of signals and dodgy maneouvres. When you’re driving in rush hour to get to a meeting there is nothing worse than finding yourself stuck behind an old fart with no more ability – or inclination – to rush than a geriatric tortoise.
The consequences are significant. Road rage is a minor side effect in comparison to the full on outbursts that are experienced when deadlines are missed, proposals arrive too late, and important people are left twiddling their thumbs until your tardy arrival.
So, new legislation is required to keep our roads free from geriatric hazards.
Old people should only be allowed to drive on public roads between the hours of 10-12noon and 2-4pm Monday to Friday, and rarely at weekends. This way their lethargic progress can’t impede that of those who actually have somewhere important to be at a specific time.
Compulsory euthanasia at the age of 70 is probably a bit harsh, so the jury is being asked to consider the proposal, with a view to extending the legislation to cover similarly limited hours allocated to old gits for shopping.
It’s for their own good, really
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What is Skelpt Arse?
To use a splendid bit of sadly, now seldom-used Scottish vernacular, whose 'arse' definitely needs 'skelpt'?
Who or what has been letting you down, letting our magnificent country down or who generally needs brought into line. Politicians? Overly politically-correct-mandarins? Jobsworth civil-servants? Service industry specialists who've not been servicing? You tell us!
We've got a sliding scale of 'skelpitness' from a light smack or a pure, red, stinger? You decide!