Some people will do anything for a free lunch


Business talks on building up economy

Published Date: 10 September 2010 Business leaders and politicians will gather at the Scottish Parliament in November to discuss how to rebuild the economy and avoid another recession. The sixth annual Business in the Parliament conference on November 12. Full Article at Edinburgh Daily News.

There is just so much wrong with this I don’t know where to begin skelping!

Firstly, SIXTH ANNUAL.  SIXTH!!!!  FFS, if the last 5 were so obviously pish, why are you having a 6th?  Is the free lunch really that good?

Secondly, 12th NOVEMBER.  Seriously, 9 weeks from announcement – and I bet it has been in the planning stages since before Summer.  Has SENSE OF URGENCY not crept into your lexicon yet?  Your guaranteed incomes, expense packages and amazing pension plans may well insulate you from the real World the rest of us live in but do you never switch on a TV or a radio or read a newspaper – good grief, even Mickey Mouse sticks his head out of Disneyland every now and then!

Thirdly, BUSINESS LEADERS.  If these people can give up a full day for a public view, sanitised talking shop which has no sense of urgency and – on past form will generate the square root of diddly squat for the economy – then what kind of leaders do even they think they are.  Clue, if you have no followers, you are not a leader.

Fourthly, oh I can’t be bothered going on, just get ready for a skelping!


Bin the conference and spend the money saved on public service, you know, the thing public servants are supposed to deliver.  Leave business to business people and vacuous talking shops to politicians.  If you must mix the two, then do it in private – real business leaders don’t care who gets the credit – and do it NOW!NOW!NOW! because real business leaders can’t wait until November and any politician who wants to get re-elected in May damn well shouldn’t.


At least we identify the useless trumpets and keep them all in one place, if only for a day.  But honestly, the costs of that outweigh any scant benefits that might accrue.

They are all just a bunch of oxygen thieves and should be treated as such.

Give em a slap
Light SlapMild SlapSlap them around a bitHard SlapYer Skelpt! (3 slaps, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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What is Skelpt Arse?

To use a splendid bit of sadly, now seldom-used Scottish vernacular, whose 'arse' definitely needs 'skelpt'?

Who or what has been letting you down, letting our magnificent country down or who generally needs brought into line. Politicians? Overly politically-correct-mandarins? Jobsworth civil-servants? Service industry specialists who've not been servicing? You tell us!

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