Poor Show at The Citz


I attempted to buy two tickets to a show at Glasgow’s Citizens Theatre and sadly it turned out to be much harder than it needed to be!

I chose two tickets, however the online system would not allow me to buy them so I called the box office. I was surprised and horrified when I was told by the operative that I could not have those tickets because it would leave one seat in that section and one seat was hard for them to sell!

Whilst I understand their plight it’s not my problem! As a regular theatre goer (this is is my first & last contact with the Citizens) I have never experienced anything like this anywhere else!

The issue was further compounded by the fact that my buying two tickets wouldn’t have left one seat for them to sell! However, it would have left one seat in that price bracket and a further two seats that they class as “restricted view”. When I put this to the operative he advised that “he cannot leave one seat in a price bracket” so unless I now suddenly wanted three seats I couldn’t have the seats I wanted despite them being on sale (apparently “on sale at the Citizens is different to everywhere else).

It wouldn’t have been quite so bad if the operative had not been so abrupt about it – customer service was not his strong point!

All in all it felt like a crass attempt to squeeze more money out of me. Not what I expect from the so called “Theatre of the People”.


Like every other theatre in Glasgow if a seat is for sale, for Christ sake sell it!


Very poor show

Give em a slap
Light SlapMild SlapSlap them around a bitHard SlapYer Skelpt! (24 slaps, average: 4.58 out of 5)
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  • If they were seats at £50 or more you might have a fair point but the seats at the Citz are the cheapest on the planet so if you get exactly the ones you want, good for you and we’re all delighted. If you don’t, then dry your eyes Princess, it’s the Theatre of the People, not the Theatre of the shouty knobhead who would still complain if he got a free BJ in the interval.

    Want to make sure you don’t need to sit with “common weegies” you better buy the extra seats. Otherwise, bore off and bother someone else.

    Zero slaps from me.

    • Who stole your scone? Or is it your pickled onion that goes with fish supper on your shoulder?

      • Me or the bloke complaining?

    • If there are seats for sale then they should be sold, irrespective of the number of single seats that leaves. It’s very poor customer service not to do so and can have a damaging effect on a theatre’s reputation. I’m all for the Citz, but this is just a daft way to run a business – working in theatre, I have some understanding of the business.
      On a personal note, you make grand assumptions about the complainant which are unjustified. Nowhere does he or she suggest some sort of snobbery, nor that the welcome addition of a free bj would be argued against. However, Dr Who was amazing and Saturday is far too far away.

  • Had a similar situation with the Citz. It’s not right, I get ur point angry fae gorbals but it doesn’t matter what the tickets cost why should u feel pressured to buy more than u need. I agree with the complainant if the tickets are for sale sell them & brush up on your customer service.

  • But there were tickets for sale, just not the ones he wanted unless he was willing to take 3. He could get 2 tickets on their own elsewhere. If you want ABSOLUTE choice over where you sit in ANY theatre then you need to accept that will cost you a whole lot more than if you are willing to support the Theatre rather than just pick and choose what suits you best.

    Honestly, I should do a skelpt arse about people not actually reading what is being said and letting themselves get carried away with the rant instead!

    And no, I don’t work for the Citz or anything to do with the Theatre, I just can’t stand to see people whip up a whingey moan about something that could have been solved with the same amount of give and take on his side to match what he expected the Theatre to do unilaterally.

    • You make so many assumptions, how do you know it was a man? I suppose it must be a man if you say so! But then you call the complainant “Princess” you are so confused nothing from your mouth can be trusted;)

      As for you “doing a skelptarse” bring it on…

      • Dry your eyes Princess isn’t quite as funny if you aim it at a woman.

        Anyway, if he (or she, point taken!) lets me get away with calling him (or her) out as rudely as I did without coming right back at me, no wonder he (or she) never got the result they were looking for from the Citz. Soft Walter fae the Beano’s got mair bottle

        Ah, but there used to be real arse skelpers back in the old days – those ancient heady weeks and months of, errm, 2010 – when all you had to do was step outside and you could find something to complain about. Where are our Cooncil chiefs? Where are our Tram corporations? Has anyone been called an asshat this week? Does anyone know where or what Edinburgh is? Did you all see Dr. Who on Saturday?

        What was the question again?

        What mighthave been an interesting additional rant for bawjaws (or bawjawsina if it’s a burd) would be to find out where the Citz host their online booking system, as in which country? Now there’s me telling you how to do a real Skelpt Arse, leave no stone unturned in the pursuit of wholly unjustified and unjustifiable revenge! Revenge: the dish best served steaming hot! Get intae them!

  • It does not matter where they host their online service from as if you had been reading the complaint you would see that that the complainant had clearly spoken to a box office employee after they got no joy with the online system. There would be no point on the complainant coming back at you because your an idiot who is more interested in insulting people. Grow up

  • Angry fae Gorbals, you are an idiot. The person complaining is entitled to complain and you are a twat. You’ve made all kinds of assumptions and your offensive. If the tickets are for sale the person is entitled to buy them – your entitled to chose the seats you want that’s why they offer you a choice. If I was the complainder I would not be replying to you cos u don’t talk sense, I would just sit back and amuse myself at you getting your knickers in a twist and making a prat of yourself

  • Angry Fae Gorbals is an asshat, may his/her next shit be a hedgehog

  • What in the name of the wee man is an asshat?

    And why does the skelpometer only go up to 5?

    • Asshat definition

      1. n.
      the imaginary garment worn by one with one’s head up one’s ass. (Offensive.) :
      2. n.
      a person said to be wearing an asshat (sense 1). : Wake up you stupid asshat

      Not sure why the Skelpometer only goes up to five, maybe to prompt you to forward the story to all your friends to get them to skelp it at five too, the more skelps the better I suppose!

      Asshat is such an appropriate term for Angry Fae Gorbals isn’t it? The irony of it all is he said it first;)

  • Sorry to have been away for so long, I was cleaning up dug shit – interesting that you people are more concerned about Lord or Lady Trumpington and their extra theatre seat than you were about the Glasgow Mess posted last week. http://www.skelptarse.com/2011/04/18/dont-mess-in-glasgow/

    Bet you’re all westenders and you think your poo smells like roses.

  • “angry fae gorbals” comments are unjustified, unfair and irrelevant.

    Anyone buying tickets from ANY theatre/cinema/show/concert/anything should be able to choose the seats they want and how many. Why should someone be forced to pay for 3 seats when they only want two? It is very disappointing that the Citz treats it’s customers like this! What if two tickets had been bought, leaving one, and an individual wanted to watch the show? Furthermore, if an individual only wanted one ticket, would they have to buy three?!?

    Poor Show Citz!

    • More assumptions! Sheesh, and it was me getting the blame for that one.

      You all assume the original complainer would fit into 1 seat. What have you got to say about that?

  • Hey Angry Fae Gorbals “Assumptions” – takes one to know one!

  • [...] rant from Skelpt Arse highlights the trouble had when trying to simply buy two tickets to see a show at the theatre and [...]

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