Police Horse POO


Whilst take a scenic stroll down the newly paved  up and coming Clydeside, Glasgow, taking in the view whilst the sun ravished the rippling depths of the river Clyde, I almost skidded on some Elephant sized dumplings… Policemen on their horses trotted away in the distance, up on their “high horses”, ready themselves to reprimand – “do as I say “- to our public.

Is it not undeserving that we should have to suffer the stenchy life sized poos that are dropped without thought on our paths and roads when most of us who have dogs, are very much aware how offensive it can be to step on a poo – a dog’s poo, a giraffe’s poo, a monkey’s poo … yes, especially a horse’s poo!?  We use our poobags.  We put the poo in the bin…Poo scoops?  Poo bins? cCme on work with me here!


Training the horses to use the loo would be another option. Po(o)tty train them!

Or I would suggest, that every Police officer uses a spade that is on a long handle, and can be reached down from their High Horse so that every piece of poo is picked up.  It’s an absolute disgrace to be faced with this size of poo on a warm summer’s day. YICK!  No one likes to be met with a big poo.  NO ONE.  Unless you’re a fly I suppose.

And why should it be different for the POOlice?  Should they not be setting Poo standards?  I think a citizen should be able to arrest the POOlice horse or the POOlice officer for any unattended POO.


We await a response from the POOlice on why they can’t implement the apparatus shown above.

Give em a slap
Light SlapMild SlapSlap them around a bitHard SlapYer Skelpt! (11 slaps, average: 4.09 out of 5)
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